Abandonware

None of you cunts deserve the above link, as SOMEHOW we're losing ground to 3D POTATOE. But I couldn't help myself, games galore all the way from back in the day of missile command and other Terminator inspiring shit.

Post, or the giant mechanical cock is gonna hunt YOU down :)

Still want a Robot ? Build it yourself

Then use it to Crush evil humans

CDisplay & Battle Angel Alita

I learnt something cool about CDisplay today, you can start it up and hit Shift+R and it will go straight to the page you were on when you last shut it down. Also it can read rar and zip archived pics without you needing to extract them first.

I got down the Last Order series which I'm "saving some for later" because I have vol 1 hard copy for later. But I started the extra stories, and they are fucking rad. Awesome stories, like fairy tales sometimes, but with tragedy and shit. This dude was winning awards for his manga when he was 17. The setting is awesome, the characters are awesome, the art is awesome. You get everything. The main character is gorgeous and there are wicked weapons and gadgets. The world is rich and real, with several really well developed settings which the story moves through. Not just big assed eye candy like evil castles and shit. I also love the way he incorporates Japanese martial arts culture into the world of cyborgs. The fights are great, and actually interesting because of all the strategies they use and wierd weapons and styles and shit.

Plus the robots and cyborgs are all rad, and you can't beat motorball. Most manga is pretty shallow, and either serious but lacking substance ("honour compells me to walk the earth kicking ass in astonishing actions scenes") or childish ("I am indignant that males keep looking at my cleavage, grab hold of my umbrella and let's fly around having sci fi adventures"). Battle Angel Alita never disappoints.

If you only ever read one manga in your life, it should be this series.

The extra stories are numbered vol 1, 3 and 4. If any one spots vol 2 anywhere (assuming it exists and they didn't just fuck up the numbering, which is possible as these are I'd imagine collected from other compilation manga) PLEASE let us know.

Also there was an offshoot series ASHEN VICTOR, about a suicidal motorball hero who deliberately crashes every race, and the spectators all plug in to feel it with him. It's pretty dark. I bought an issue or two when they came out but missed the boat with the whole series. It has been released in trade paperback. If anyone spots it online LET US KNOW.

TAGBOARD

Skaffen, could you consider setting us up with a TAGBOARD on here? To increase the efficiency of time wastage at work? I think all here will agree, this is a serious issue which needs to be addressed. I can't ICQ or MSN here at work, a tagboard would be SWEET. You can kill the page when the boss works in, drop back later, and crap on.

Dudes if skaffen gets one up and running, when you get on there and want to know if anyone's around, just post the time of day. Then when I get on there at work, I know how long it's been since your message and have an idea whether anyone's around.

I keep farting, the office stinks and my co-worker told the clients in the lounge. I have been told to stay in here with it until I can learn to get along with others by not making smells which cause people to vomit into their mouths a bit.

STRANGE ATTRACTORS

Yeah sure animators who get funding and aren't me are cunts, but check out THE GAME. You will love it. Uncomfortably close to an idea of mine re: behind the scenes in the lives of video game characters, but it is good, and I can still do mine, so no harm done and no contract killing required. But thanks for asking.

Online comics and Kaleb Daark

OK - speaking of comics, lets share some of our online favourites. I don't care whether it is old skool stuff or funny or any other shit.
I'm a bit of a fan of Sluggy - not serious, but its got daemons in it. Being a geek I also regulary read Userfriendly.
A few of the others listed in the "funnies" section of slashdot are OK.

A non online comic, but it would be great if someone could locate the rest of it for me is Kaleb Daark - it was in White Dwarf in the 80's (yes I am that old) and I've only been able to these episodes online. Malal, the fifth chaos god, ( Games Workshop got rid of because of some stuffed legal agreement with the writer or they didn't like the idea) might be an interesting story for any of you Warhammer geeks. Just google "Malal" and read the forum posts.

OH BOY download comics

Use Cdisplay to read them

http://suprnova.org/
- this one has everything, like the first 100 issues of Spawn and shit
- and Heavy Metal and all kinds of shit

http://www.rippersanime.com/index.php?page=Manga
- here's the new Alita series, plus all the old ones, and some extra stories

http://www.thehawks.org
- this one plays up for me but you nerds will get it to work, more manga and shit. Apparently "beserk" is good
Also Ichi the Killer

Burn and mail to me, I will smile. Having a 56k modem is like living in the dark ages.

Slay the Dragon! Or alternatively just be a gay Hobbit.

ASHES 2 ASHES

g

There you go, saves me reviewing it. Click on the cover there and you'll get a pdf preview of several pages. I didn't get that cover, spewing. But I still got a cartoon cover at least, not a gay photo cover. There are 5 or 6 alternate covers, some rare and expensive. How's that for a scam. You'd have to be an idiot to buy 6 copies of the same comic with different covers, but I guess people do or the companies wouldn't make them. Anyway it was $6AUS, well worth it I reckon. Better than a shit overnight video. Great art as you can see in the preview, and the story's cool. Some wierdness in the art sometimes, kenetic fight scenes where you can't tell which direction someone's swinging. But it's no biggie and didn't spoil it for me.

Ash's lines sound like him talking, and the story has some great ideas. If they can pull out one or two ideas each issue which I didn't expect, I'll be happy. I'd recommend this comic. I don't recommend buying it, I recommend buying something else, bringing THAT to my house for me to read, and you can read my copies. I'm getting the whole series anyway, 4 issues only apparently.

Also, check THIS site out for a rad comic advertised in A2A, they have previews there too. It has the old school Heavy Metal mag aesthetic, whoohoo

And THE GOON looks cool, I'm looking into getting some trade paperbacks.

OHH, OHH, also they did a sequel to the BATTLE ANGEL ALITA series, and I'm getting the trade paperback with a Borders voucher from my brother-in-law! YAY! It looks awesome. Plus have change to get R Morgan's Broken Angels. I got Market Forces the other day. Life's short, GEEK OUT

American McGee's Zombies

And other funky stuff on his site. This is the guy who made "American McGee's Alice" strangely enough (mentioned earlier in this blog) which was one sexy game except for the stupid Jabberwocky that just wouldn't die.

He's also oldskool and was in the game back when Commander Keen came out.

Anyway, Scrapland looks fun and there's a heap of nice concept art for this "Zombies" thing and other interesting geeky goodness.

Uncle Fucking Cool

I've been on the piss since Thursday with a bunch of mates that came to visit from Melbourne. This is the best I can do right now, and I'm pretty happy with it. Enjoy.

Man on Fire

See it. It's awesome. Great editing effects, like Natural Born Killers. Great story, very violent but also with a lot of emotional weight - quite moving. A lot of people cried in the cinema.

Time to change the header dude

It's one thing at work, but tonight my 3 year old walked in while I was at TML and said, quite rightly, "what's that daddy?!"

I went to a comic store today

The owner was hilarious, like the perfect dude to play a comic shop owner. I bought some comics for my 10 year old. And one for me. Which my wife doesn't know about because she will
- get mad
- then laugh at me
- then get mad again
I got a comic about Ash from Evil Dead, his adventures after Army of Darkness.
Cool

EDIT: I forgot to say:
The comic store is a 5 min walk from work

Looking at comics makes me want to draw, so I did. Yay

TYRANTS FROM AFAR

Direct link to teaser

Site with more mirrors if needed

Pretty awesome little clip. They reckon they'd make a feature if they got the funding - this is pretty rad for now.

w00t!

Hahahahahahahaha, AWESOME!

I've signed up for beta land, but don't like my chances. All the same I am a little excited about a WarHammer 40k PC game. Hopefully it's not dogshit.

Fast work connection appreciation

Nightshift at work, set up my laptop and hmm what's this, a network cable, OK, let's give it a burl - yep, I'm online, and it's fast... 200mb video tutes later, better give it a rest hey?

Driv3r

Driv3r is cool. As mentioned previously, somewhere in this blog, Atari have successfully taken most of the good shit from the original Driver and used it in this title to good effect.

There's a slew of vaguely familiar cars to drive, all of which behave differently on the road and still maintain surprising realism from the physics engine (this coming from someone who doesn't have a license.) As the level progress they throw you into a variety of these cars, forcing you to take a few turns in each one to get the hang of that particular vehicle before you can feed it to the evil fuckers you're after.

Following on from the trend the GTA3 franchise kicked off, there's the obligatory motorbike (shitly implemented) and a couple of big trucks, buses and even some boats to fuck around in. Pretty pointless, poorly implemented and effectively useless in the game, except of course when they dump you in the ocean and you have to get home. The boats are handy then.

Something thats gradually diminished from games over recent years is the ongoing storyline, told as you progress through the missions. My fondest memories of this sort of delivery comes from titles like StarCraft and though the storyline of Driv3r obviously covers a different scale entirely, the concept is still there and assists in dragging you into what's going on plot wise. They've got dudes like Michael Madsen to record dialogue and recognising a voice in the cinematics makes the whole thing that little bit more enjoyeable. Cut scenes are delivered by pre-rendered animations, rather than in engine, but this is good 'cause apart from the cars the game engine looks pretty crap.

Unfortuantely Atari have followed the recent trend in console games to include third-person shooter components. Consoles are shit for shooting guns, everyone knows this but some people seem to like it, but I suppose some people like having someone taking a dump on them too. The shooty bits are pretty crap, the controls are typically useless and all in all I feel it detracts from the pace of the game.

Finally, Atari have fucked up the end of the game. Much like in the first Driver and American McGee's Alice, which was an otherwise immaculate game, the final level is a magnitude more difficult than the rest of the game. Now I don't mind a challenge, and Eightball can vouch for my success in overcoming such obstacles as the finale of Driver, but I CANNOT see the point in discarding the skills a player has built up as they work through a title, nor destroying their enjoyment in the game, just to produce a hard-to-beat final level. Cockheads.

So yeah, I've paid out several aspects of the game, but that's more because my job's giving me the shits rather than because they detracted noticibly from the game. Driv3r is great fun and will take most people several weeks to complete. Getting the hang of vehicles really gives you a kick, before too long you're carving your way through traffic like it's a re-enactment of Ronin, but without convienent gaps between oncoming traffic.

If you don't like my first review, suck my dick.

BRILLIANT!

Especially considering I've just about had enough of these fuckers.

Plenty of good ideas...

My Ears Are Ringing

Might have something to do with the blasting grind and gore metal on Saturday night. Whoah. The highlight for me: punching Damon Bloodstorm (a big scary-looking guy with a potatoe for a head) as he was walking past, then pointing over his shoulder at Eightball. Damon looked confused, so I punched him again, harder, and pointed at a young kid next to me. Damon smiled and patted them both on the head, and there were sighs of relief all around. Except from me, I was hoping for an eruption of drunken violence.

Citizen Urban Icon

- Highly poseable cutting edge urban figures with your favorite styles!

Like Kidrobot, not as many designs (only half a dozen or so) but they're pretty cool. I love the little shoes and clothes.

Poo on a Stick with Vermicelli Noodles

You fuckers (and I include myself in the fucker bit) are just not trying hard enough.
I've been testing and updating a web proxy filter for the last few days. It doesn't block this blog.
Just for shits and giggles I thought I'd create another blog (at the moment it looks fucking awful) to see what was allowed for titles. Cunt Arse was born. The filter doesn't block that either. Maybe I need to mention hot sluts, or the filter isn't trying hard enough. Maybe because it is Friday I should go home and have a beer. Yep thats what I'll be doing right now.

28 Days Later

Virus film from the director of Trainspotting. They're like zombies, but FAST. It's more of a sci-fi film like the Omega Man, than a classic zombie film. The violence is pretty gruesome, in parts VERY gruesome, and while I found that satisfying, that feeling changed to discomfort shortly after - it's a bit close to the bone these days with Iraqi beheading videos floating around (which I have not seen and don't intend to.) The violence is portrayed in a particularly realistic way is what I'm trying to say. This film is well shot, the script is pretty tidy, and the characters are well developed. It's not an awesome film but it is pretty cool. There is certainly at lot more at stake than most US horror films, and the main premise is that the virus makes friends and family turn on each other, which ups the ante from "us vs them" to "all bets are off".

Yurtle the Turtle

Well I type this with a beast popping out to say hello, & he's getting aggressive..

I started my new job about 2 months ago, in a largish company of about 160 staff. Things have been going OK until today. Today the crappers have signed out. if they were a hockey team they'd be in the sin bin for fighting. if they were a footy team they'd be Hawthorn..

A couple of weeks after I started here the toilets started playing up. upon plumbing investigation it was discovered that our 6 dumping stations all emptied into 1 5 inch pipe. & it is (apparently) law that only one toilet can be connected to a 5 inch pipe.

OMFG TRAGEDY I hear you cry. SO... a major undertaking was launched to bring our toilet system into the 21st Century. (I still harbour hopes of digital remote shitting whilst being serenaded by MP3 music & having the dags gently washed off like barnacles by super smooth plastically servant robots, kinda like the ones in I-robot but with big boobs). However this was not to be, several weeks of industrial drilling later our thrones have officially packed it in & I've been choking this one off all day.. someones gonna pay, & they're not going to be happy when they do.

On the other hand is it coincidence 2 weeks after I start the toilets are deemed 'not up to the task' I think not...

I am one proud blogger

Kiss My Axe

so last night I stayed true to my word & delved into the 2000AD archives. I got all my 2000AD monthly's. Some gems in there, ABC Warriors, Strontium Dogs & Slaine. some pretty good issues. Bad Company & a crap heap of Rogue Trooper issues. & some stinkers Skizz & ABC Trucking etc.

Also anyone interested in the early days of Judge Dredd I have a couple of years of 'the complete Judge Dredd' which collected issues in a monthly basis from issue 1.

& to answer someones question from a few posts back

yes comics were heaps better years back. & even most of my 2000AD's are to recent to be really good. hence my almost complete lack of Nemesis... I can feel a graphic novel purchase coming on...

ROBO BRONTO

HERE
I ran a google search on "online manga", found a billion links as you can imagine but the first one I stumbled across I'm quite liking. It really looks like it was drawn by some dude, it's got a hand made feel, not perfect like so much stuff out there. Makes me think of smoking bongs until I hardly knew my own name and then sitting down to a pile of comics I bought with what was meant to be grocery money. I wonder how often these people belt out a page. Would be fun, but that'd be the only hobby you'd have time for.

Everyone encourage Eightball to start an online strip about inflatable sex toys in space. "Set a course for Uranus!" "I'm ramming you as hard as I can cap'n! WE NEED MORE LUBE!" Eightball's pencil case art running around trying to score drugs and roots - that would be cool.

I'm sure the site "Drunk Duck" where it is hosted has more cool shit, I haven't got around to having a look yet...

THE GADGET SHOP

HERE

Whoops, there goes Skaffens next 3 paychecks!

CABIN FEVER

It's really good. Scary, funny, and I actually found it pretty nauseating too.
Great casting, solid script with good dialogue, and very well acted. Plus there's some fucking you beaut wierdos. Cabin Fever pays homage to the horror films of the late 70s and early 80s, right down to the film stock they used. Forget "I Know What Cup Size You Were Last Summer" and the rest of that shit, this is the real fucking deal. Nasty, violent and fucking sick. Joy!

Horror flicks are never quite as good as at 4am on nightshift, at a detox unit with all the lights off. The unit I used to work at had possums, watching The Others at 5am the entire fucking possum family went sprinting across the roof, and dinner went sprinting into my jockey shorts. Now THAT'S good scare for your dollar. Here's a tip: Delerium from sleep deprivation several nights in a row + too much coffee + a scary horror film = glad there's a washing machine at work.

Pants on Fire

Mentioned in comments previously but looks so good it deserves it's own post..

http://www.ongbak-lefilm.com

looks totally fucking bad-ass.. & for those who doubt it, check the trailer & then argue the case.

1. he double knee drops through 3 building floors onto a dudes chest

2. he fights WITH HIS PANTS ON FIRE....

this guy is a fucking god. I enjoyed it so much that my pants which were previously on fire, were totally extinguished...

Ghost in the Shell 2: Innocence

Download the Japanese trailer for the sequel to GITS. 57 Meg Quicktime, Here is the page if it doesn't like external linking.

Let me know if it's good. Actually don't bother, we all know it will be.

Save Skaffen

We seem to have lost Skaffen to Doom3. He has not even pulled his pud in the last 12 hours.

I am concerned that 3DPotatoes post count is actually catching up with Tentacle Monster Lair. What's going on, what do you people do all day while you're at work? Work?

John Titor

HERE
Blowing my mind, or is it the alcyhol talking>|?