Resident Evil: Apocalypse
What the fuck?
I have heard rumours in the past that from time to time movie companies intentionally produce shit films in order to claim tax write-offs, or something like that. However, I cannot see how any actor, director, or directors-nephew-who's-been-given-a-shot-at-hollywood could knowingly put there name to something as bad as this film.
They managed to get Milla back for round two, along with some kinda cute Lara Croft wannabe. Then they handed the filming of the movie over to someone who's OBVIOUSLY a film-student trying to squeeze in every text-book directors trick they've studied and blew some cash on CG and costumes that my Mum could do a better job making.
The end result is almost similar to John's 'Escape from...' masterpieces simply because they all look budget, except this film is a bucket of rotten fucking donkey nuts.
Some actors cannot act, that's a given and we see it every day. Some sets look cheap, fair enough. But when every shot in a a film is either a still, or filmed from behind a grate or chickenwire fence (yep, I'm serious) I'm just cannot tell if it was done intentionally as a joke or if the guy's got hemorroids of the retina.
I concede the above is not entirely true, during fight scenes the camera is shaken around a bit, though it never keeps the actual fighting in-frame and often points AWAY from the actors.
One line summary: A marine shoots a zombified dog and says 'Stay'... It wasn't Arnie.
Film yourself shitting and watch that before you rent this movie.
I have heard rumours in the past that from time to time movie companies intentionally produce shit films in order to claim tax write-offs, or something like that. However, I cannot see how any actor, director, or directors-nephew-who's-been-given-a-shot-at-hollywood could knowingly put there name to something as bad as this film.
They managed to get Milla back for round two, along with some kinda cute Lara Croft wannabe. Then they handed the filming of the movie over to someone who's OBVIOUSLY a film-student trying to squeeze in every text-book directors trick they've studied and blew some cash on CG and costumes that my Mum could do a better job making.
The end result is almost similar to John's 'Escape from...' masterpieces simply because they all look budget, except this film is a bucket of rotten fucking donkey nuts.
Some actors cannot act, that's a given and we see it every day. Some sets look cheap, fair enough. But when every shot in a a film is either a still, or filmed from behind a grate or chickenwire fence (yep, I'm serious) I'm just cannot tell if it was done intentionally as a joke or if the guy's got hemorroids of the retina.
I concede the above is not entirely true, during fight scenes the camera is shaken around a bit, though it never keeps the actual fighting in-frame and often points AWAY from the actors.
One line summary: A marine shoots a zombified dog and says 'Stay'... It wasn't Arnie.
Film yourself shitting and watch that before you rent this movie.
posted by skaffen at 5/11/2005 01:02:00 pm
4 Comments:
... so let me get this straight. I should hire it? Or buy it?
I think he wants you to wait until the release of an extended special edition and buy that. That way it might have some extra scenes.
Thanks for your help! I'll pre-order 3 copies now on the credit card.
Actually I am grateful for the review, I didn't mind the first one and would have hired this sequel.
Sorry, I should have pointed out that is was in fact the directors cut extended gold edition special release that I reviewed.
Unfortunately the extra-scenes were not footage of someone riding a motorcross bike into the directors nuts.
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