New Priest
My wife bought me the CD, because she is a clever girl.
I should add:
- The cover sports a big homosexual robot
- The ballads are the best thing since The Scorpions put pen to paper
- This album rules
I should add:
- The cover sports a big homosexual robot
- The ballads are the best thing since The Scorpions put pen to paper
- This album rules
posted by stompbox at 8/08/2005 07:43:00 am
12 Comments:
This album kicks my ass so much, so much in fact that i will endevour to do a track by track rundown on how fucking rad it is...
Track 1. Angel of Retribution
This kicks it all off so well, the chorus hook of
JUDAS IS RISING.
sets up the rest of the album so well, yes, Judas is rising & he's going to whip you silly with his riding crop.
WHIPPPPASSHHAAA
Although I did like it slightly more when I thought one of the lines was
'attacks like a swan'
Unfortunatley it turns out I was wrong I give this track
10 leather SS caps out of 10
Track 2 - Deal with the Devil
After the "Painkiller-esque" riffs of Judas Priest this is pure 80's Priest. The riffs are fuller & chunkier but still have enough cheese to make you the lactose intolerant amongst you flare up & get a bit itchy...
& He also says soemthing about Driving around in Transit's, which I think is a nod to the Ford Transit van's that carried rock & metal on their backs for so many years.
Once again I'm probbaly a bit wrong & it will only serve to make teh song a bit worse, so if I am. Don't tell me otherwise.
I give this
10 Busted ass Ford Transit's out of 10
Track 3 - Revolution
Starts with the bass player trying out a new effects pedal, after that it kicks into good ol' Priest stomping, gang-vocals anthem.
One of the things I really like about this album is that halford keeps name-dropping old Judas Priest albums & songs.
I dont think he does it in this song though...
This song isn't as good as the otehrs, if it was on a new Iron Maiden album you'd go OH MY GOD IT DOESN'T SUCK SO MUCH ASS, but as it is on this album it's up against some pretty stiff competition
I give it
8 Cheap 3D modelled Eddies out of 10
Track 4 - Worth fighting for
This is the sort of preist track that made Manowar realise they could have a career.
Brooding semi-ballad vocals, A chorus that makes you want to strap yourself back into your battle armour & pick up that notched broad sword (+2 of radness) & go hacking at orc's for the honour of... whatever.
No hippies in sight here.
I give it
9 severed orc heads out of 10
or
9 skull-tankards of mead out of 10
hang on he just said soemthing about tumbleweeds & kerosene, wtf?
oh well even if it is about the old west or some shit I'll still be there in my armour kickin ass...
Track 5 - Demonizer
Oh shit, this song is a total gem, with falsetto lyrics that make Justin Hawkin's (The Darkness) go 'damn, thats some squeeky shit'.
The riffs are probably some of the best that are on this album I think.
Out demons out...
reminds me of Kyuss's Demoncleaner, which is enough to make any song fucking awesome.
I give this
10 rampant selfish demons out of 10
Track 6 - Wheels of Fire
Another of those awesome early 80's JP throwback kinda songs, the riffs are simple enough to be classic priest but also full enough to make them solid enough for todays ears.
This could just have easily come off '79's Hell Bent for Leather.. Or off anything by Dio ever..
it's that good
I give it
10 Green Manalishi (with the 2 pronged crown's) out of 10
Track 7 - Angel
Obligatory ballad, I'm not into ballad's at the moment, even though they are rad sometimes you can't be bothered waiting around for the radness
But this is one of those past referances that make this album cool
Nice, sad wings of destiny reference.
I give this
8 homosexual robotic angels out of 10
Track 8 - Hellrider
if this doesn't make it onto the Ghost Rider movie soundtrack then there is some seriously wrong shit going on in the world...
& we all know that it wont.
Awesome drums & vocals in this one, problaby the most 80's Halford vocal track on the album I think.
I gave credit to Demonizer for the falsetto, but it's really only at the end, this one has Rob going up into the upper (gay) register all the time.
Hellrider must be deaf as fuck or Halford's vocals would simply tear his head off in this one.
This makes you want to jump on a motorbike light yourself on fire & adopt a skull for a head..
nuff said
I give it
10 RACV extra cover memberships out of 10
Track 9 - Eulogy
Another ballad worthy of placement on any Dio album, more past JP references which is cool.
If you saw this live, the lights would all be down & Halford would be lit by a lone blue spotlight, you'd sit there thinking cool, but when are you going to ROCK. But your signifigant other would think it was really cool so you'd pretend to like it so as to keep shit working & you'd be allowed to rock out later.
I give it
8 $7 beers in a big plastic cup out of 10
Track 10 - Lochness
OK, now my metal credo has always been, if a band takes the time to sing about ancient Egypt that immediatly has a good chance of being their best song write there (Nile really make their benchmark hard)
But a new benchmark may have been set, this song is about the loch fucking ness monster for shits sake??? how fucking awesome is that???
I mean if more bands sung about a mystical waterbourne dinosaur that lived in freezeassingly cold water I fail to see how the world COULDN'T be a better place.
Oh & to top it off it's 13 minutes long.. If Judas Priest tour down here I promise I will be in the front row screaming
LOCHNESS, TERROR OF THE DEEP!!!
It's fucking awesome & reason enough for this album to go down in the annuls of metal history as fucking awesome.
I give it
666 malingering terrors of the deep out of 10
I think I just read the most awesome album review ever. Eightball I salute you with a demon blade of shadow wrath.
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